England Found Guilty of ‘Playing Whilst Black’



Following on from Tuesday night’s Under-21 fixture, which was marred by controversy at the final whistle, England and Serbia have been reprimanded by UEFA with charges pertaining to the conduct of both nations.

Whilst the Serbian FA are being investigated for alleged misconduct by their fans, UEFA have moved quickly to slap England with a charge for a “wanton display of multiculturalism.”

Speaking from their headquarters in Switzerland, a UEFA spokesman issued a brief statement to the press;

“They (England) clearly sought to incite scenes of a racially aggravated nature by flaunting an array of ethnicities amongst their playing staff. Not only were there White and Black players present, but also some in-between ones.  Whilst UEFA does not condone prejudice in opposition of genetic or cultural diversity, we also can not be seen to condemn it. It is of paramount importance to UEFA, that everyone retain their right to be as abhorrent and antiquated in their political and social ideologies as their prerogative so dictates. We’re here to administer the football associations of Europe, not to kick the political wasp’s nest”.

The English FA have moved quickly to issue a response in which they urge UEFA to “take the strongest possible action” against Sebia.

“The FA makes strides towards eradicating racism from the game by taking swift, decisive action, no matter how high profile the case. We feel that tacit acceptance of the matter on a case by case basis, by means of a paltry fine to those involved, will send a clear message to the offenders.”