Queen surrenders British Empire to the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea
Following on from the most disgraceful and cowardly act perpetrated by the British Empire in presenting the Southern rag in place of our glorious banner, the Royal lady Queen Elizabeth has surrendered her Empire and all it’s vast lands to Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un.
As a duty to her once subjects, fearing the wrath we would reign down upon them for this mark of disrespect, Elizabeth shall abdicate immediately and hand full care of the Empire to Pyongyang.
The dishonour is thought to be born of jealousy, after our heroic athlete’s victory in the FIFA World Cup, decimating Brazil in the final. In full knowledge that a Gold medal is nothing but a formality in each Olympic event for the Korean Republic, the deceitful Western lizards sought to distract our brave sporting legends.
In defence of our purity, our heroes wandered from the pitch, refusing to play until the flag of the DPRK flew majestically above strategic symbols of the British Empire; Buckingham Palace, the Eiffel Tower and The House White of Liberty. In the interim our vastly more advanced than anything they have Taepodong-2 missles were primed and ready to fire.
Senator David Cameron was pictured holding King Obama of the American Colonies as they both wept, knowing that their devilish agenda will soon end.
The people of the Empire are now rejoicing, liberated from their oppressors and are planning firework displays in honour of our Supreme leader. The displays will later be televised for your viewing pleasure. Please note that ‘Kim Jon-un’ translated to the Western pig tongue is ‘Happy New Year’.
With regard to the sporting match, our noble, pure and beautiful women, unsurprisingly conquered two to zero over the Land of Cocainbia thus winning the Gold medal.